Many of you have heard of people who write because they want to become a writer. My story is different.
In my 20s, I wrote just to get my feelings out on paper—good or bad, it didn't matter. I didn't think of it as a skill or a habit. I just knew that after I wrote, I felt lighter. That was the whole point.
But somewhere between then and now, writing became something bigger for me.
Today, I use writing for much more than relief. I use it to see my own growth on paper. I use it to notice patterns I keep repeating without even realising it. I use it to think — not just to write down what I've already thought. Some days it feels like having a conversation with myself. Other days, it's simply where I dump all the noise in my brain, so I can finally hear what's underneath it.
For a long time, I thought this was just "my thing." Maybe even a bit of overthinking that I could never fully explain to anyone.
Then I read The Female Brain by Louann Brizendine, and something clicked.
She writes about something researchers call "mirroring." It means certain brain circuits switch on not just when we do something, but when we watch someone else go through something — almost like we're feeling it too. Because of this, a female brain is often quicker to pick up on hidden clues—a change in tone, a tense shoulder, a pause before someone speaks. She doesn't always need words to know something is off. Some researchers believe women may have more of these mirror neurons active than men, which is why we can sense what someone's feeling before they've even said it.
I read that and thought — this is exactly why I can't just "let things go" the way some people seem to. This is why a tense conversation from the morning is still sitting in my chest by night. My brain isn't broken. It's simply doing what it's built to do — just doing a lot more of it than I ever gave it credit for.
Here's the part I keep coming back to: I don't have a problem. I have a female brain — and on top of that, a mommy brain. One built to divide its attention across everything that matters—work, husband, child, home, myself. All at once. All the time.
This is also why women overthink, multitask, and worry about several things at once. It's not a flaw. Our brain neurons naturally divide themselves across the different areas of our life that need our attention. So while you're at work, part of your brain may still be thinking about your child. While you're talking to your husband, part of it may already be running through tomorrow's to-do list. It's not that we're bad at focusing. We're built to carry more threads than we usually get credit for.
That's exhausting to carry silently. But it's not exhausting to write down.
If a female brain really does pick up on emotion, tone, and unspoken tension more easily — and shows more emotional activity overall, as this research suggests — then all of that has to go somewhere. It doesn't just sit quietly. It builds up.
That's the real reason I journal. Not for productivity. Not because it's a nice morning habit. I journal because my brain takes in more than it can process in real time, and paper is where that overflow finally goes.
That's exactly why I tell every woman I know to try it—especially the ones running on empty. Not as one more task on your list, but as a friend who stays beside you, whether it's a good day or a not-so-good day. One that doesn't ask you to explain yourself first.
Your brain isn't the problem. It just needs somewhere to put everything it's carrying.
If you don't know where to start, I made something simple for exactly this. It's called The 3-Minute Reset — a free short guide with one journaling tool to help you empty your mind when everything feels like too much. Just three one-minute prompts: Name It, Empty It, Anchor It. Download your free copy from here.
If you like listening, then I have shared this blog in podcast form. You can listen over here.
Have you noticed this in yourself — picking up on things before anyone says a word, carrying conversations long after they've ended? I'd love to hear how you deal with it. Reply and tell me.